0celluloid-dreamer0

Hey guys, I just wanted to let you know that I am DELETING the majority of the deviations on this account and moving onto my new account!

I'm been offline so much on this account, and I think it'd be hard to pick back up.
So I'm moving on to this DA: QuixoticZombie.deviantart.com/
I'm going to be more serious about the stuff I post too, so expect some nice art. (;
Also, if any of you would like to find/add me on facebook, please send me a note on my new DA.

I will check back now and then on this account, but please, follow me and contact me on QuixoticZombie!
Sorry I haven't really talked to any of you, but I hope to be getting back in touch with all of you soon. <3

-Amanda

It's about time for a journal update, wouldn't you say?

Sorry I haven't really been around.
Well, I have been around, I just haven't been doing anything.
I'm still kinda down since my grandparents' passings; I attended their burial service yesterday.
It was really touching... I was one of three who decided to say something, along with my cousins Ashley and Jeff.
Marines were there, since they were both in the Marines.
There was a 21-gun salute, too.
It was breathtaking, really.
They would have loved it.

Our trip to Hawaii was last week.
It was beautiful there, so much better then I had imagined.
I got TONS of photos, and if you don't believe me, I have 896 photos on one memory card, filled to capacity.
I had to go to the WalMart on the island to buy another.
YES KAUAI HAS ITS OWN WALMART
ITS AMAZING
itookapictureofit
Anyways.
Don't expect the pics too soon, I have to shift through them all still.

I still have to complete my summer reading assignment for AP English too.
School starts August 24.
We're supposed to read "All Quiet on the Western Front", a war novel from the German veiwpoint during WWI. Not WWII, WWI. World War One.
Supposedly the best war novel of all time.
But we don't only have to read it, we're supposed to write an indepth question list.
I don't know what to call it.
It's like we need to keep a literary journal on our thoughts as we read the novel, and question things and crap.
I seriously have no idea why I'm in this class, I didn't want in it, I didn't try on the placement exam.
><
Another thing I don't get is how I got into Honors World Cultures.
I didn't even apply for it. I applied for Academic World Cultures.
Yet I got my class listing(not schedule, listing) for this upcoming year, and "Honors World Cultures" is on there.
What the shit.

Lessee lessee lessee... what else.
Oh! I started a chicken/rooster collection.
xD
I love chickens.

I have some drawings, sketches, and OMGWTFMGS comics to upload.
As well as an assload of photos.

Umm.
I think that's it.

Finally, an update. o.o
It's pretty small, and pretty crappy, but I've been meaning to upload something, at least.
I have some more plushies to upload, as well.
I'm just still kind of struck down from all the losses I've been going through.

All the legal jazz is finall taken care of, though, so I'll be spending less time in courthouses, attorney's offices, and legal offcies, and more time at home.
I'm pooped. D:

The school year's coming to an end, too.
Thank God. D:
We get out June 11.
Well, we have this upcoming Monday off, then the next week is a full week. We're also taking our finals and getting everything finished up.
Then we just goof off the Monday and Tuesday after that, have Wednesday off, then go on Thurdsday for about an hour to get our report cards and such.
I'm excited for summer.
I'll miss seeing my friends every day, and seeing Nathan every day, but I need some rest.
I'm looking forward to Hawaii too.

ALSO.
OHMYGOD.
REPO! THE GENTIC OPERA.
I freaking love that movie!! <3
If you haven't seen it, get your little bum to the store and buy, and watch it.
A million times over.
The tunes are so catchy, the characters are so unique and amazing, it's just generally dark, humorous, and just entertaining. =]
And Nathan Wallace is just sexy. And his voice. OOOHHHH his voice. <3

Ummm..
Anything else? I think not.
Buh bye for now.

About a month ago I turned 15, my grandmother died, and I announced my hiatus.
That hiatus is still in effect, I just want to give you all a heads-up.

My grandfather was moved to UPMC about 2 weeks ago in critical condition.
Though, everything the first hospital had diagnosed turned out to be bullshit... they wanted him to go into surgery to remove gallstones.
We found out that he didn't have any gallstones at all.
Pricks.

A day after that happened, my uncle Jeff had a stroke and was life-flighted to UPMC for critical condition. They released him 2 days later.
He's doing okay I guess, the stroke affected his left frontal lobe. (Of the brain, in case you didn't catch that.) That part of the brain deals with emotions, so he breaks down and cried extremely easily now. He also has trouble forming sentences and carrying on a conversation, but he's still the Jeffjeff that we know and love dearly.

About a week ago they sent my pap home... his pneumonia is gone but his lung cancer has reached the point were help just isn't quite an option. So now we're just trying to keep him comfortable.
Yesterday we spent the day at the farm, I spent the night... we came back for a few hours so that we could change clothes and get a shower and so that my mom could get her meds and I could charge my phone and all that jazz.... we're leaving to go back out there in about 2 hours.

More on his condition though, he's on morphine to ease the pain of breathing... he's basically sleeping/unconscious for the most part, though he did stay awake for about an hour and a half at 9 last night.
You have no idea how relieved I was to see those gorgeous blue eyes of his again.

It's amazing and utterly surprising to me that he's still alive right now. He's a real fighter... I thought he was going to leave us two days ago, and then I thought he was going to leave last night...
But he's still holding on.
I'm proud to say that he's my grandfather. I always will be.

Whenever he does pass I have a lot I want to tell you guys about. He's an amazing man, I'd love to share some stories and memories.
Just please, keep him in your thoughts and/or prayers. I just want him to pass peacefully.

Thank you so much for you support, we really need it, and we're extremely thankful.

I haven't been here for quite a while.
O.o

I just wanted to let everyone know I'm still alive, though things aren't going too well for me.

Good news is that I have a wonderful boyfriend named Nathan, he means the world to me. <3
One day I'll upload a picture of us together.
One of the problems though, is that his father was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer.
I'm praying for him and his family and wishing them the best, I hope you will too.

Yesterday, as some of you may know, was my birthday.
My birthdays never go well, because for some reason my mom always has to work and a goofy science fair known as "PJAS" is always conviniently planned on my big day... so I can't spend time with my friends or family.
Though, yesterday, something happened.
It can be counted as both good and bad.

My grandmother passed away.

I didn't want to believe it at first, but I'm kind of glad that it happened.
She's been bedridden and blind for three years, and everytime I looked at her I could see how much she despised being alive.
She lived a very rough life and I'm so sorry that these past few years were terrible for her.
She meant a lot to me, and I kept asking God to take her away in her sleep, so she could live this world of pain with ease.
And that's exactly what he did.
In a sense, I think this is the best birthday present I've ever recieved.
I think this shows that God does exist.

One story though, I always have to tell this when I talk about my grandmother.
I love this story, and every time she told it I always laughed but I felt bad at the same time.
You see, she grew up in an old house with 5 brothers and sisters.
Their mother never really made them anything special back in the day, since she was always busy caring for the kids and cooking and taking care of the house and such.
But every time a birthday would come around, she would bake a big cake.
Well... the day came around for my grandmother's birthday, and she was so excited for that cake.
But in the afternoon, she asked her mom when the cake would be ready.
Her mother told her she was too busy to make a cake and gave her a box of Ritz crackers instead.

She hated Ritz crackers for that reason.
I can't help but just to crack a small smile at that, but I feel bad at the same time too.
I think I just have a humorous outlook on life.

Anyways, I just hope that you can keep my family and Nathan's family in your prayers, if you pray.
If you don't, your good wishes will suffice more then enough.
I'm just kinda down right now and I don't think I'll be around to doing anything any time soon.

I just want to thank you guys for your support and everything.
See you again sometime soon.